Blow em off
Yesterday was kinda nice, in hindsight not as nice, but we'll get to that later I think.
What began as a trip south became a detour to the north to pick up some forgotten wine followed by us getting lost once we got to the south.
We eventually found or way to the bbq-party, or more correctly, the host found us and led us right. Bbqd some meat, drank some alcohol, had an overall good time and got a hug or two which made me feel like gold and got my hopes for today up. I was confused last night due to the amount of mixed signals, but I felt the scales were tipping my way, seems I was wrong. How can anyone be so hard to read and understand.
Now I can't help but feel that I've been blown off, and man does it suck.. Spoke on the phone and she said she'd call me back, obviously she hasn't. Why does it all have to be so complicated when it could really be quite straightforward, yes or no, love or hate, but no, if it isn't complicated it isn't real.
The chase is better than the catch said scooter, on my account it isn't, I get so fucked up in the head playing these mind games that most of the time the chase seems to be nothing but terror with a smile or a hug mixed in somewhere along the way to make me think that I'm not barking up the wrong tree.
Is that what I've been doing this last year, barking up the wrong tree? I don't know and sometimes I don't even think that the tree herself knows, it sure doesn't feel as if she knows what she's doing.. And if I was barking up the wrong tree, how do I leave this one behind and find another? Cause I don't think I can use the concept that M tried to teach me, the "anything goes" approach, I just can't get my mind straight and move on, I can't take "anything" since I know what is out there..
In the wrong tree / Monkey Boy
What began as a trip south became a detour to the north to pick up some forgotten wine followed by us getting lost once we got to the south.
We eventually found or way to the bbq-party, or more correctly, the host found us and led us right. Bbqd some meat, drank some alcohol, had an overall good time and got a hug or two which made me feel like gold and got my hopes for today up. I was confused last night due to the amount of mixed signals, but I felt the scales were tipping my way, seems I was wrong. How can anyone be so hard to read and understand.
Now I can't help but feel that I've been blown off, and man does it suck.. Spoke on the phone and she said she'd call me back, obviously she hasn't. Why does it all have to be so complicated when it could really be quite straightforward, yes or no, love or hate, but no, if it isn't complicated it isn't real.
The chase is better than the catch said scooter, on my account it isn't, I get so fucked up in the head playing these mind games that most of the time the chase seems to be nothing but terror with a smile or a hug mixed in somewhere along the way to make me think that I'm not barking up the wrong tree.
Is that what I've been doing this last year, barking up the wrong tree? I don't know and sometimes I don't even think that the tree herself knows, it sure doesn't feel as if she knows what she's doing.. And if I was barking up the wrong tree, how do I leave this one behind and find another? Cause I don't think I can use the concept that M tried to teach me, the "anything goes" approach, I just can't get my mind straight and move on, I can't take "anything" since I know what is out there..
In the wrong tree / Monkey Boy
posted by Monkey boy at 6:06 PM
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